The cultural world churned up yet another heaping serving of fishy stench in 2008. To the stinkers go …
Ick
Paparazzi stalked 15-year-old Miley Cyrus seeking a $30,000-$150,000 payday for a snap of her first kiss.
Double ick
Speaking of photos, Cyrus posed in a bedsheet for Annie Leibovitz and Vanity Fair, disavowed the sultry shots after the Disney crowd protested, and at the end of the year blamed the whole controversy on the fact that “the States are really conservative.”
Spit it out
When Chris Brown fans made “Forever” the country’s No. 3 song, little did they realize that the single was a reworked Doublemint gum jingle (“Double your pleasure, double your fun”) paid for by Wrigley.
Hope this doesn’t give Amy Winehouse any ideas
An eBay bidder paid $5,300 for a tissue into which Scarlett Johansson had sneezed.
They asked for payment in Scarlett Johansson tissue boxes
Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt sold the first photos of their newborn twins Vivienne and Knox to People and Hello! magazines for a reported $14 million.
Words we hope we never again see together
Mini Me sex tape.
“Knight Rider” remake.
For those about to rock, shop at Wal-Mart
We don’t know what’s worse, that AC/DC turned its back on music outlets to make its new album, “Black Ice,” available only at Wal-Mart or that the move paid off big-time.
Wait, we know what’s worse: The album itself!
We don’t know what’s worse, that Axl Rose turned his back on music outlets to make the 14-years-in-waiting Guns N’ Roses album “Chinese Democracy” available only at Best Buy or … wait, the album tanked, didn’t it? Never mind.
Speaking of karma, how’s that career going?
“Then this earthquake and all this stuff happened, and I thought, ‘Is that karma?'”
— Sharon Stone wondering whether China had it coming after an earthquake that left close to 70,000 confirmed dead
‘MOMMMMMM!’
“I was just so proud to show off my big old Jim McConaughey — and his gift.”
Kay McConaughey, actor Matthew’s mother, writing in her memoir “I Amaze Myself!” about her naked husband’s corpse being carried out of her house
Pick your poison
Pierce Brosnan singing in “Mamma Mia” vs. Billy Corgan ranting onstage
At least now the Picasso can watch TV
A new office building that’s part of the long-awaited Block 37 development was marred by a screechingly loud, awkwardly placed video screen, which blasts WBBM-Ch. 2 programming and promotions toward Daley Plaza.
Two thumb-suckers
Disney’s TV division jettisoned Richard Roeper and regular guest host (and Tribune movie critic) Michael Phillips to place two Bens, Lyons and Mankiewicz, at the center of the “At the Movies” franchise. The only thing that plummeted more than the show’s IQ level was its ratings.
He’ll take his Alewife raw
After reportedly trying to line up his own replacement in the Broadway production of David Mamet’s “Speed-the-Plow” to no avail, Jeremy Piven abruptly abandoned the show two months before its scheduled closing claiming mercury poisoning from too much sushi. The announcement spurred ridicule from Mamet, co-star Raul Esparza and those who have managed to keep the sushi-addiction monkey off their backs.
Now playing at the Alewives multiplex “The Love Guru”
(14 percent “fresh”/ positive rating on RottenTomatoes.com). “I briefly considered stabbing out my own eyes so that I wouldn’t have to watch it any more.” — Joshua Starnes, ComingSoon.net
“The Women”
(13 percent). “One of the worst movies I’ve ever seen.” — Richard Schickel, Time
“10,000 B.C.”
(9 percent). “Yabba-dabba-don’t.” — Stephen Whitty, Newark Star-Ledger
“88 Minutes”
(5 percent). “The picture easily snatches from ‘Revolution’ the prize as Al Pacino’s career worst.” — Todd McCarthy, Variety
“Witless Protection”
(0 percent). “About as charming as being slapped by a stranger.” — Christopher Smith, Bangor Daily News in Maine
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mcaro@tribune.com
